What Are You Afraid Of?

by Peggy Nolan

What are you afraid of?

Sometimes we're so scared of things that are not life threatening, but our minds create a black hole of darkness. Surely our lives will end if our fears come true. Raise your hand if you're afraid of anything on this list:

Being alone
Not being good enough
Feeling unloved
Not having your parents approval
Not getting promoted
He won’t call again
She won’t go out with me
Commitment
Divorce
Raising kids
Confrontation
Trying something new
Making a change
Thinking differently
Making better decisions
Hurting someone’s feelings
Not being liked

I could go on an on. These fears stop us dead in our tracks. They keep us stuck in the same boring jobs, dead end relationships, and they keep us from living our lives to their fullest potential. What are missing out on because you're scared of being alone?

What are you afraid of?

When I was going through my divorce, I thought the world had ended and I would surely die from a broken heart. After nineteen years of marriage, this was a tough change and it scared the daylights (and nightlights) out of me! But I struggled and persevered! I came through the other side 180 pounds lighter (no, I didn’t lose that much weight!) and surprisingly enough, I didn’t die from a broken heart. I mended that just fine all by myself.

What are you afraid of?

Shortly after I received my divorce diploma, I was diagnosed with breast cancer. Talk about scary stuff! Something I could really die from. Scared? You betcha! I have a whole list of things I was scared about. What scared me most was not being around to do all the things I hadn’t done yet

See my daughters graduate from high school and college
Shop for wedding dresses with my daughters
Watch my daughters walk down the aisle and say “I Do”
Hold my grandbabies
Find my own Truly Madly Deeply
Travel all over the world
Become who I’m supposed to be

The list I originally wrote in my poem, "Can’t Die Mom", is longer…a lot longer…but as I go through the list of everything I was afraid of not doing, I realize I have done it or I am doing it! Why? Because my fear turned to courage. Fear was the catalyst that showed me the way to find my courage and put one foot in front of the other!

I witnessed Jessica graduate from college in 2006.
I watched as Christina received her high school diploma in 2006.
I’ve shopped for wedding dresses with Jessica, Katie, and Kelly (Katie and Kelly are my stepdaughters) and I know I’ll be shopping with Christina when it’s her turn.
I sat in the front row as Katie said “I do” to her husband, Jon…and it won’t be long before I see Jessica married to her fiance, Noel and Kelly married to her fiance, Dave.
Olivia, my first grand-baby was born June 15, 2009. I was there in the waiting room when she was born and 30 minutes later, she was in my arms.
I found my Truly Madly Deeply in my husband, Richard…the man who once was the boy I first fell in love with…
Travel? Oh my…we travel! Since Richard and I got married in 2006 we’ve been to Florida three times, Italy, Charleston, SC, the Turks and Caicos, and next year we’ve got Florida, Ireland and Utah on the radar.
And I’m pretty sure I’m on the path of becoming who I’m supposed to be.

What are you afraid of? What roadblocks and excuses are you making up inside your head that stops you from being the best you? Are you willing to allow your fear guide you to your courage?

Peggy Nolan
http://thestepmomstoolbox.com
toolboxgrl@gmail.com

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